In my role as a coach, I notice the working habits of my clients as they share their world with me. There is no difference between the habits of a corporate employee or a business owner, the unconscious patterns are the same.
Most people are working too hard and the balance between work and personal time is sometimes non-existent.
There’s too much to do, not enough hours in the day, and my clients are unfocused because they are getting splattered and distracted too easily.
Most of us know what we should be doing.
Our clients might know they need to prioritize. They are aware of basic time management principles and most of them know what they think they should be doing…
The main issue is actually a deeper one and while some basic time management principles might help, these just address the symptoms. It is important to explore deeper with your client if you want to help them move beyond their overwhelm.
Let me explain…
If you don’t create some space for personal time and your work, then I can guarantee that you won’t remain productive for very long! (I’m sure you have proven this to yourself in the past – I have for sure!)
Overwhelm and ultimately burnout are waiting around the corner. You’ll soon start to make mistakes and become exhausted.
A lack of space causes overwhelm in a couple of ways:
1. Obsessed with work.
Nothing else in your life matters. Everything revolves around your work. It becomes the priority. You find reasons to work and excuses for avoiding any other activity such as creating personal time or family time.
Being addicted to work you feed off this stimulus. Burnout ultimately happens when your relationships fail and your health becomes problematic because you’re not paying attention to the basics.
Whether you are an employee or you work for yourself, you delude yourself into believing by working all hours – a promotion or business success is just around the corner.
“It’s also our collective delusion that overwork and burnout are the prices we must pay in order to succeed.” — Arianna Huffington
2. Overwhelmed by work.
Workloads become so much of a burden that you lose all sense of any meaning or value in your work. You become disillusioned both on a psychological and emotional level, and you feel trapped and stuck. “Is this all there is?” You feel pretty miserable and exhausted.
Most successful people are dedicated, hard-working, and conscientious and there are times when you have to burn the midnight oil or work through the weekend to get something done. This is perfectly okay and normal. There is a significant difference, though, if this is happening all the time and it is relentless.
No one is productive for 8 hours a day. So you’ll be even less productive if you consistently work 12, 13, or 15 hours a day (Research has proven this)!
“By working faithfully 8 hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work 12 hours a day.” — Robert Frost
So if this is happening there is a problem that needs addressing.
Here are two questions to ask yourself/your client:
- Why are you constantly working long hours and feeling exhausted?
- Are you really being productive in all these hours you are working?
If the answer to the second question is NO…
You may be working long hours and staying late at the office without any real focused activity. This is a self-related issue.
- You may be using your work as an excuse to hide from other activities such as an unhappy (or no) personal life.
- You might not know what to do with yourself when you are not working because you’ve gotten out of the habit of relaxing and enjoying hobbies, interests, family, and friends.
- You have become addicted to work and your identity associated with it.
- You perceive your value and worth come from your achievements. You believe that your only value lies in being successful and accomplished. Unconsciously you believe if you don’t receive external recognition, then you are worthless.
This is where workaholic tendencies hang out.
How coaching can help:
Understand how your own personality style unconsciously influences your working style. Recognize your unconscious patterns, and how to create new healthier ways of working, set some boundaries, tap into your own values, refocus, and begin to create a personal life for yourself outside of work.
Reconnect to your heart – Stop paying attention to the outside and shift your attention to your inner world. Learn to open your heart, and notice sensations around your heart. Breathe. Relax and ask yourself what are you feeling (deep coaching can help with this).
If the answer to the second question is YES…
If you are being productive in all the hours you’re working, then this is telling you a different story because this is a job-related issue. Here are some things to consider:
- You have too much to do!
- The structure of the job itself needs to be reviewed because it’s impossible to achieve everything within normal hours.
- You may be a people pleaser saying ‘yes’ to everyone else and ‘no’ to yourself.
- You’re trying to do everything because you perceive saying no to extra work as a weakness.
- You are not realistic about what you can achieve.
- You are disorganized, perhaps working against the grain of your natural strengths, and need to practice some customized self-management principles consistently.
How coaching can help:
You might need some support to help you learn how to delegate or outsource aspects of your role, get hired help, set some boundaries, and learn to be more assertive and say no. Review the role it’s not realistic, you are spread too thinly!
Learn how to do things YOUR WAY in alignment with your own natural strengths. Develop a deeper understanding of your own working style. This will help you to maximize your own mental energy effectively, be more productive, and get out of your own way. Use self-management approaches that align specifically with your working style to help you to be more productive.
Whenever my work becomes overwhelming, I consciously step back to put it into perspective – Work is important but it’s only one part of my life.
Remember to live your life to the full! Not from behind a laptop!
Check-in on your working habits and do one thing today that helps you to create a healthier balance between your work and business life.
Have you noticed any of these characteristics in any of your clients?